There is absolutely no doubt that 50/50 shared parenting is the best thing for the children. Of course there are exceptions to this rule. Unfortunately too many narcissistic people believe just because the other parent has different parenting styles than they do that is a reason to alienate the children from that parent. If a parent is not physically or mentally abusing the children there is absolutely no excuse to not have 50/50 shared parenting. A parent’s hatred towards the other is no excuse to abuse the other parent in court.
These are just a few of the stats with (oh and for those that need the source sited this is from U.S. Department of Justice on children raised in fatherless homes):
- Suicide: 63 percent of youth suicides
- Runaways: 90 percent of all homeless and runaway youths
- Behavioral Disorders: 85 percent of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders
- High School Dropouts: 71 percent of all high school dropouts
- Juvenile Detention Rates: 70 percent of juveniles in state-operated institutions
- Substance Abuse: 75 percent of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers
- Aggression: 75 percent of rapists motivated by displaced anger
When you get divorced in most states (including the home of Reform Our Family Courts Now, Colorado) you are required to attend a divorce class on how to treat the children in a divorce. It seems like the attorneys and judges need to take that class. The very first thing they tell you is to not talk badly about the other parent. Then the attorneys and judges fight for more time for one parent or the other. What signal could send a louder message to the children than one parent is not good enough to have you as much as the other. In other words let’s say one parent only gets every other weekend. That tells the children the weekend parent is not as good as the other parent.
If 50/50 is mandatory it will stop all the fighting at the beginning that turns into long term hatred. I can tell you right now that is when my ex basically lost her mind. The fact that I had the nerve to say I wanted equal time with my children (that is also what they wanted) was so outrageous to her she began a terror that has gone on for 5 years. If it was mandatory that would have never happened. It would have been the normal. She would not have had to make 100s of false allegations and motions as a road map to gain custody of the children.